At times in life we all fail at something. Nobody's perfect. None of us deliberately sets out to fail, but the reality is that, at some point, we all experience failure. Whether it's relationship breakdown, failing an exam, a missed opportunity, a wrong decision, a bad idea - or a combination of them all – the feeling we have failed can set us back and knock us off-track. But our failures do not define us...
Failing can impact negatively on our emotions, leading to disappointment, bitterness, resentment and loss of confidence. It can bruise our self-esteem and leave us with a sense of hopelessness or despair. However, we learn as much from failure as from success.
Today, we are all living in times of constant change. The amount of communication and information we receive daily makes the pace of change seem to be rapidly accelerating. Many of us find ourselves overloaded, having to hold many different things in our minds at once, making us feel as if we are regularly functioning on autopilot.
How often have we set off in the car, arrived at our destination, only to realise we can’t remember anything about the journey? How many of us walk into a room to do something, only to forget what it was we wanted to do? Our attention is so often hijacked by thoughts about the past, worries about the future or on our own mental chatter.
I often see people whose sense of worth has been adversely affected by shame. Of all the painful human emotions, a core sense of shame is the most excruciating and difficult to bear.
From birth, we are vulnerable; reliant on our mothers and fathers to help us grow and develop. When our parents respond appropriately to our physical and emotional needs in a ‘good enough’ way (Winnicott) it feels natural, right and good. It instils in us a sense of safety in our world, a sense of our own intrinsic beauty, forming the core of our self-esteem.
After the rush of Christmas and the New Year approaches, January can be a difficult month. The festivities and excesses have ended; the weather can be cold, damp and dismal; it can seem a long wait until springtime.
Fog unfolding from the Mendip Hills near where I live, has a natural beauty of its own, but can sometimes cloud vision, making it hard to see the way forward.
Hello. I finally got round to writing a blog, which I will launch in January 2013. I'll write about many of the issues that affect us all.
I hope you'll read and respond if you have something to say.
I look forward to hearing from you.